Matt,
A couple of really good ones. Yogi Berra (the famous baseball player/manager) used to come up with a lot of funny sayings. One of my favorites was when someone asked if he ever goes to so and so restaurant and he replies "Naw, no one goes there anymore it is just too crowded". Or, "You better cut the pizza in four pieces, I am not hungry enough to eat six". Or, "Half the lies they tell about me aren't true".
One of the programs that I like is Tales of the Texas Rangers. I don't know how to embed the address but this is the site:
https://archive.org/details/TalesOfTheTexasRangers It is based in the 1940's-50s on true cases of the Texas Rangers (still towing trailer with horse for the back country). Actor Joel McCrea plays the main character and is very good.
Some others are Gunsmoke, Sherlock Holmes, The Shadow, and many more. All on Public Domain (free) and down loadable.
Tom (found out how)