Hi Mick
+1 to Sheldon, he's always my first call for a basic grounding in any aspect of bike tech.
ERD is easily measured with two spokes two nipples and a ruler. Roger Musson(Wheelpro) tells you how. This is why I like his approach, he suggests you take full responsibility for the whole build, just like you might hope a professional would. No fobbing off responsibilities to shops or forums, they won't be much good to you if your wheels fail underneath you
As for spoke length you know you are getting good when you can cope with disparate values from different calculators and sources, and allow for rounding to the nearest 2mm on spoke length, and still get really evenly tensioned wheels with all the spoke heads flush with the bottom of the screwdriver slots in the nipples
I have an unconfirmed suspicion/theory that spoke breakages on Rohloffs are more likely to occur if the spokes are a little on the short side and the build finishes with some spoke thread still showing below the nipples. I am convinced that some thread, right on the bending point where the spoke exits the nipple would act more significantly as a stress raiser than a smooth spoke shaft....
Some shops that HATE Rohloffs still carry short enough spokes. I know I called Spa to buy some, let on what they were for and got a verbal broadside about heavy, draggy and expensive etc. You can't beat Yorkshire folk for straight talking honesty, no "side" to them
I still love them
Happy days
Ian