Thorn Cycles Forum

Community => Muppets Threads! (And Anything Else) => Topic started by: Danneaux on September 05, 2013, 03:14:35 am

Title: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: Danneaux on September 05, 2013, 03:14:35 am
Hi All!

We've all done something foolish or stupid at one time or another while riding or repairing our bicycles -- just to prove we can make the mistakes necessary to maintain our membership in the human race.

Given misery loves company -- and we all make ourselves miserable with such things from time to time -- how 'bout sharing some of your best cycling mistakes? The topic has appeared anecdotally amidst other threads, but a fresh standalone topic will probably make us all feel better when the inevitable happens.

I'll start with one of my many ehm, lapses...

Some decades ago, I tired of my bolts loosening and figured LocTite would be the solution. To my credit, I used blue LocTite 242 (medium strength) so I'd have a chance of breaking the bolts loose again for maintenance.

Unfortunately, this was also the occasion I came into a supply of 5mm stainless button-head bolts...the real pretty low-profile ones. The ones with the 2.5mm sockets in the heads. Sockets half the diameter of the bolt threads.

All was well for some years until I needed to remove the rear rack.

The LocTite's grip far exceeded the torque I could safely apply and the tiny sockets promptly tore out with little effort, leaving me with what amounted to rivets. I couldn't apply adequate heat to break the bond without damaging the paint. The rack bolts were inside the seatstays, so I couldn't drill them out to use an extractor. Slotting the bolt heads with a Dremel cutoff wheel helped, but I couldn't get a regular slotted screwdriver blade in to turn them free. Even my angled ratcheting drivers wouldn't do the job. I finally got them undone with a cut-down driver bit placed in a small box wrench, 1/16th turn at a time, given the limited clearance. It took awhile.

Ever after, I've used either 5mm socket head (allen) bolts with 4mm sockets or hex head bolts that give me a better chance at removal if the fastener corrodes or a reasonable chance of breaking the medium LocTite free with the usual tools.

Another time I was tired and hungry 2/3 of the way into a 300km ride, wet and riding in the dark when I got a flat up front. Changing the tube, I inserted the wheel backwards. Arriving home from what I was sure would be a personal best, I was disappointed to find all my post-flat mileage unrecorded 'cos the computer's spoke magnet was on the opposite side of the fork pickup sensor. Oops.

So...any "unsuccesses" you'd care to admit to/share for the good of the community?

Best,

Dan. (...who thinks confession might indeed be good for the soul)
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: brummie on September 05, 2013, 11:00:40 am
I was heading down my steep driveway towards the junction with the main road one morning when I pulled the brakes only to realise I hadn't re-connected the V-brakes from the previous nights 'fettling'. I took evasive action into the flowerbed...
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: JWestland on September 05, 2013, 11:31:14 am
Not connecting the brake back on the fixed wheel.

Classic mistake! Luckily noticed it before I went into a busy junction.
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: jags on September 05, 2013, 11:46:27 am
well to be honest i can't think of any,but when i was cycling with the sunday group one of the guys in  a total FRED arrieved one moning with his bib shorts inside out, ;D looked strange to say the least.another time he punctured he took of the tyre pulled out the tube replaced it, but didnt put the valve in the hole .for the life of him he could not figure out how to inflate the tyre.
this guy is a millionaire how he managed that one is a total mystery. ::)
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: sdg_77 on September 05, 2013, 08:00:43 pm
Missed a sign on last year's trip along the Hadrians Cycleway, after a while Gill asked "Are you sure this is the right way?"  you get the rest ....

http://www.crazyguyonabike.com/doc/page/?o=3&page_id=296081&v=5c


sdg.

Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: Danneaux on September 05, 2013, 08:05:34 pm
Quote
Missed a sign...
Steve, some of my best tour sights have resulted from missed turns.

All the best,

Dan. (...who figures it's not a missed turn but an opportunity grasped)
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: Fred A-M on September 05, 2013, 09:59:11 pm
Rode into a stationary car as a 16 year old whilst looking down at my front gear mech, catapulted over car, bike forks straightened and frame written off.   No serious injury.

Cycle touring in Wales as a 16 year old, phobia of insects swarming behind on an uphill climb, managed to wave myself off into a 20ft drop at the side of the road - no injury.

Borrowed my dad's bike about 6 year later, last thing he told me was he'd just had it serviced.   Light touch on brakes going downhill at approx 25mph, down to 0 mph in less than a second, catapulted over handlebars straight into tarmac thankfully onto my arms - nothing broken. 

No incidents to report in the last 20 years! :-)

 
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: Danneaux on September 05, 2013, 10:12:15 pm
Quote
No incidents to report in the last 20 years!
My, Fred, you got it all out of the way at an early age, didn't you?  ;D

Wish I'd done that...

All the best,

Dan. (...who seems to be doing his on the installment plan)
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: jags on September 05, 2013, 10:16:05 pm
Rode into a stationary car as a 16 year old whilst looking down at my front gear mech, catapulted over car, bike forks straightened and frame written off.   No serious injury.

Cycle touring in Wales as a 16 year old, phobia of insects swarming behind on an uphill climb, managed to wave myself off into a 20ft drop at the side of the road - no injury.

Borrowed my dad's bike about 6 year later, last thing he told me was he'd just had it serviced.   Light touch on brakes going downhill at approx 25mph, down to 0 mph in less than a second, catapulted over handlebars straight into tarmac thankfully onto my arms - nothing broken. 

No incidents to report in the last 20 years! :-)

 
  ;D ;D ;D ;D
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: Fred A-M on September 06, 2013, 01:39:51 am
Yes Dan, seemingly I did, as I've cycled around much of Western Europe and regularly commuted in the heart of London for the past 15 years.

My only subsequent incident was putting a small dent in the back of a particularly unpleasant and aggressive person's VW Golf, having taking my eyes off what was ahead of me, distracted by an pensioner who walked out blind into the middle of the road, wholly persuading me of their imminent demise under an oncoming double-decker bus. 

I was faced with a £500 insurance bill which I refused to pay purely on the basis of the aggression I endured - the insurance company backed down, having also pointed out that there was no way that the damage I caused amounted to £500 (10 years ago).   However, I don't consider that this qualified as stupidity!   

From that point onwards, I've always cycled with conviction but always anticipation of an accident waiting to happen - it's a philosophy that has served me extremely well! :-)
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: peter jenkins on September 06, 2013, 09:15:18 am
Not long ago I flatted on an Audax ride on my Moulton.

The Moulton has 20" (406) wheels but the first tube I pulled from the bag was a 420, which is also nominally 20", but considerably bigger than a 406. I now pay close attention to the box when buying 20" tubes.

It began to rain as pulled out the second tube, only to find I'd picked up a 700! Panic was beginning to set in as I extracted my third and final tube. Yes it was the right size, but I had 160KM left to ride and no likely prospect of a LBS enroute.

I've fallen off at traffic lights because my SPD's haven't released, and once had a chain break as I tried to take off in the big ring from a traffic light. I like to give the motoring public their amusement.

I've also fitted bidon cages upside down (as recently this week... They are an odd design) and worn out 2 rear tyres in a week before noticing that a rear brake block has moved and is contacting tyre instead of rim.

Apart from that, nothing to report.

pj
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: sdg_77 on September 06, 2013, 01:38:17 pm
Quote
Rode into a stationary car as a 16 year old whilst looking down at my front gear mech

This reminds me of an incident involving flared trousers and why it's not a good idea to grab a handfull of front brake while standing up pedalling as fast as you can ..... even if your flares do get between the chain and the front rings.  I was 13,  riding past my old Sunday School.

I survived with only a bruised ego ... the flares however ....

sdg.

Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: JWestland on September 10, 2013, 10:19:44 am
You are going to laugh but it turns out I have a great talent for getting completely lost...

...in the car. A few 15 miles detours under my belt already, and I've had it for only 2 weeks  ;D
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: Danneaux on September 10, 2013, 01:30:45 pm
Not "getting lost", Jawine; instead you're "scouting touring routes".

All the best,

Dan. (...who thinks it is all in how one turns the phrase)
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: JWestland on September 10, 2013, 02:20:00 pm
Or "I know exactly where I am, just taking a scenic route" :D
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: Mike Ayling on September 13, 2013, 09:50:45 am
Not connecting the brake back on the fixed wheel.

Classic mistake! Luckily noticed it before I went into a busy junction.

You don't really need a brake on your fixie do you? ( tongue in cheek!)

Mike
Title: Re: "I di'n't mean to be stoopid!": Self-confessionals
Post by: JWestland on September 13, 2013, 10:11:44 am
I wouldn't if everybody else on the road would be as good as I am  ;D

On that note, the guys in the local Chainreaction were winding me up with the cleat bolt from my shoe can undone. I walked in with the fixie, with a shoe flopped over the road stuck at the left pedal.

After they found a bolt for me and fixed it, one started winding me up about the front brake. It then got onto a discussion on bad driving, cyclists and how people do not adhere to the Highway Code. Which let me saying *insert heavy Dutch accent + not very bulky stature + female voice for effect* Ah, who sticks to the f***ing highway code anyway!

Q 3 mechanics laughing their balls off. Still no idea why it was so funny but there you go :)